Ring in the holidays Southern-style with comedy, 'Tuna Christmas'
Final showtimes are tonight and tomorrow
By Sally Carpenter sallyc@theacorn.com
*Editor's Note: Last week the Simi Valley Acorn ran the wrong play review under the heading of 'Tuna Christmas.' Here is the correct play review by Acorn writer Sally Carpenter. We regret the error.

Put some "Ho ho ho" in your holiday with the hilarious "Tuna Christmas" at Simi Valley Cultural Arts Center, 3050 Los Angeles Ave.

There's nothing fishy about this play- the title refers to the hick town of Tuna, Texas, where the goofy residents confront various crises on Christmas Eve.

The play is a sequel to the comedy "Greater Tuna," also written by Jaston Williams, Joe Sears and Ed Howard, and using the same gimmick: two men play all 22 roles. In the local show, Fred Helsel and Will Shupe handle the acting chores with myriad costume and wig changes. They're assisted by a team of six dressers.

There's a single nondescript set that serves as a backdrop for the various settings. Homes are indicated by different Christmas trees, such as the Bumillers', with their straggly "Charlie Brown" shrub, and Didi Snavely's, owner of a used weapons store, who decorates her tree with handcuffs and dud grenades.

The plot is a slice of life as the residents prepare for the holiday. The show opens at the local radio station as announcers Thurston Wheelis and Arles Struvie, two good ol' boys, introduce the characters.

The principal story thread involves the white trash Bumillers, a family that puts the "fun" in dysfunctional. Bertha (Helsel) struggles to keep her three sassy, bratty kids (all played by Shupe) under control as she patiently waits for her philandering husband to come home.

Hyper son Jody is tending to a birthing cat. Daughter Charlene is obsessed with her performance in "A Christmas Carol" that night at the town's little theater.

Elder son Stanley has his final probation hearing coming up. He's in "Carol" only as a way to finish his community service. He yearns to escape from his hometown and start a new life elsewhere. Aunt Pearl Burras tries to help Stanley as she also struggles to keep the bluejays away from her chickens.

Meanwhile, the mysterious Phantom is vandalizing holiday yard displays. Who is the Phantom? And will Vera Carp's plastic nativity set with the electrified baby win the best yard display trophy for the 15th year running?

Shupe unveils a plethora of colorful and distinct characters with masterful performances, from the woebegone boy Petey Fisk to the bubbly waitress Helen Bedd to the testy matron Dixie Deberry, who's "older than water."

Helsel's funniest characterizations are the buffoon Sheriff Givens; Didi's dimwitted husband, R.R., who thinks he sees UFOs; hypoglycemic Joe Bob who picks a fight at the restaurant when his order isn't ready; and Elmer Watkins, who invites the town to the Klan's family dinner and skeet shoot with the theme "The Whitest Christmas."

Helsel's female characters aren't as compelling, as he plays them with pretty much the same voice and mannerisms.

While the play is funny, it needs polish to really "zing." A comedy like this needs to move nonstop to keep the momentum going, but the show pauses too often for set and costume changes. Most of the hand props are mimed and often in a sloppy manner; more real props would help. Also, the actors stumbled over several lines.

Still, the show is a refreshing alternative to the usual perky fare of "It's a Wonderful Life" and "A Christmas Carol." Here in Tuna, not everyone gets the present she wants.

And that's like real life. Families often fall short of their unreasonable goal, to make the season "perfect." Bertha typifies the many souls who are heartbroken when a wayward relative isn't home for Christmas, yet she still believes he'll show up.

Perhaps that's the meaning of Christmas- one can still find hope, love and a friend who cares, even in a ratty little town like Tuna.

Running time is 2 hours, 35 minutes. The final showtimes are 8 p.m. Friday and Saturday, Dec. 21 and 22. For tickets, call (805) 583-7900, (805) 583-7900 or (805) 583-7900.