The Art of Being

The only constant is change

"The Buddha taught that everything is impermanent- flowers, tables, mountains, political regimes, bodies, feelings, perceptions, mental formations and consciousness. We cannot find anything that is not impermanent . . . . We think that impermanence makes us suffer. It is not impermanence that makes us suffer. What makes us suffer is wanting things to be permanent when they are not."

- Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh

I was the tender age of 13 when my very first girlfriend dumped me. Oh, the pain and indignation of it all.

I recall how, at another time in my life, I cried when my dog needed to be put down because he had reached that point where the pain in his aging body was greater than he could bear. That was like losing my very best friend on the planet.

I can also remember a time in college when money was scarce and I needed to part with my favorite guitar because the rent was late. That hurt more than a root canal.

I certainly recall the grieving process I went through when my daughter was no longer "my little girl" but growing into a woman. Those special daddy and daughter times were gone forever.

Can you recall the times in your life when you emotionally suffered the most? Regardless of when or where it was, I would wager that the suffering was attached to your desire to have something in your life stay the same when in actuality it was in the process of changing or wanting something to change before its time had come.

Most likely it was in regard to a relationship, a material possession, a career or a financial issue. The bottom line is, someone, something or some condition was either coming or going when your preference was otherwise.

What we often fail to remember is that the only constant in life is change. This could be referred to as the law of impermanence. It's a universal law that everything that has a beginning must have an end. It is when we resist this law that we suffer.

So whether you are clinging too tightly to someone, something or some condition, or wishing something would change sooner than later, realize that pain in life is a given. All God's children got pain- suffering, however, is an option.

Change is an inevitable and necessary part of your experience here on this planet. That's the good news, or the bad news, depending on your perspective and the current state of your evolution and sense of unity with the Whole.

I leave you with the words "This too shall pass." Embrace this truth and witness the deep and profound inner peace that comes with release.

Let go and let God and then trust the process. Life knows what it's doing.

Dennis Merritt Jones is the spiritual director for OneSpirit Center for Conscious Living in Simi Valley. His website is www.OneSpirit.org.