The Art of Being

"Where were you when the world stopped turning that September day? . . . Did you lay down at night and think of tomorrow and go out and buy you a gun? Did you turn off that violent movie you're watching and turn on I Love Lucy reruns? Did you go to a church and hold hands with some stranger, stand in line and give your own blood? Did you just stay at home and cling tight to your family, thank God you had someone to love?"

- Alan Jackson

9/11: Where were you then

and where are you now?

I suspect we can all recall where we were on Sept. 11, 2001, when we first heard the tragic news regarding the terrorist attacks on our country. But I would like to invite you to go deeper into that question, and by this I don't mean just your physical location but rather where were you in your mind and heart?

Where were you in your consciousness, which is simply the sum total of your beliefs about life? Begin by remembering what your life looked like on Sept. 10 of 2001, prior to the attacks.

How did you spend your time? Did you cherish your days with your family? Did you go to many violent movies? Did you spend quality time pursuing a deeper relationship with the Infinite Presence of God?

How did you treat strangers, especially those who were different from you? Were you patriotic? And, on the morning of Sept. 11, did any of these things change for you?

In short, in the past six years, what is different about you?

I recall that in the months immediately following the attacks, there was no such thing as a stranger in my community. Relationships changed: Everyone went out of their way, taking the time to acknowledge one another with a friendly comment or gesture.

Waiting in line at the bank was actually pleasant. People were not complaining; they were simply chatting, sharing a common moment mixed with tenderness, sadness and gratitude. The blood banks were actually turning donors away for the first time ever. Church pews were full.

Brotherhood, family, selflessness and unity seemed to have taken on a deeper meaning after 9/11; it appeared that while something very bad had happened, America had changed for the better. Why? Because we as individuals had changed for the better.

Regretfully, some of the amazing changes we have made seem to have been more temporary than others.

How quickly we tend to forget about what is truly important once the fear and pain that often motivates change diminishes. It's interesting to note how quickly the invisible walls and barriers that seem to divide us disappear after a major tragedy strikes, helping us seek what we have in common with others rather than judging how we differ.

I believe what is ultimately important is that we each ask ourselves this question: "How did I change after 9/11, and if that change was positive, have I sustained it?"

In the midst of a world in crisis, to backslide on the positive changes we have made in our country and in ourselves that were motivated by the events of that tragic day would be to dishonor all of those who perished.

This week as we honor 9/11 by our remembrance, let us pay great respect to those whom we lost that profoundly shocking day and let us once again celebrate the many heroes who have reminded us all what selflessness looks like. But even beyond that, let us each take time to focus on "where we are" in our lives today as individuals because of 9/11.

I close with the last line of Alan Jackson's song: "Faith, hope and love are some good things He gave us, and the greatest is love, the greatest is love."

Deepen your faith and practice a deeper awareness of God's presence moving in and through all that you say, think and do. Embrace your hope, but most of all, love more, my precious friends; love your family more, love strangers more, love yourself more, love God more, love life more.

If 9/11 reminds us of anything, let it be to remember there is always room in our hearts to love even more, never forgetting we truly are defined by that which we love the most.

Dennis Merritt Jones is the spiritual director for OneSpirit Center for Conscious Living in Simi Valley. His website is www.OneSpirit.org.